Dear T,
It was only two years and a few months. I haven't got my head around to say a proper goodbye to our relationship. I believed in our weird way of pursuing the relationship. It certainly was not a big fire of love but it was more like slow-cooking, gently warm and comfortable like my favorite blanket. You hated that blanket. You kicked it out everytime and even said you'd throw it away next time you see it in the bed. When I told you about my previous relationships that ended up being really fucked up, you held my hands quietly yet sincerely. We had a couple of tough moments. I almost broke up with you because of your stubborn and logical way of thinking. It lacked sympathy. You are still very stubborn and extremely logical but you have changed. It was love. I thought we were going to last longer. I'm happy for you to be able to progress in your career finally. We were very sure that long-distance would not work for us. You called me you got the job. You must have been really happy because that was what you wanted for so long. But your tone was not. I was happy for you. But I couldn't help myself my tears bursting. It meant the end of us. It's been a few weeks. I am so eager to tell you how much I still love you. I scroll down the photo gallery and there are photos of you. I pretend they aren't there. I pretend my heart doesn't ache. I pretend our past doesn't exist. A hair I pick up in my room, that's not mine. A fragrance on a pillow case, that's not mine. A box of Italian herb, that's not mine. A space you used to like, that's not mine. It only takes less than a second to hit me that you're not with me anymore. No matter how hard I try and pretend. You won't look at me with your beautiful grey eyes like you used to anymore. You won't tell me you love me anymore. It hurts. Hurts like a threnody. I don't want to write this down because it is going to close our story officially. But I need to let you go. Thank you for giving me love that hurts this much to end. It makes me realise how much I loved you. I loved you sincerely.
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